While exploring the various Kink Academy videos for potential topics to write about I was initially surprised by my interest in learning more about age play. I’ve not done a lot of age play, and even when I was doing it I didn’t think of it as age play.
When I first was introduced to the concept I was not that interested in it, though motivating that disinterest was partly having a partner who is just over ten years older than me, as well as being the youngest of three, the baby of the family, so most of my life I have wanted to be older than I am. Because I was Submissive during that initial introduction and it was introduced to me in the way of the Big having power and the Little not having power that role wasn’t an interesting one. I now know that those assumptions and limitations initially introduced to me are simply untrue.
There aren’t as many age play videos uploaded as there are, say, rope videos, but the three that really focus on it are all excellent. There are two introduction videos and one that goes a little more in-depth specifically talking about bringing power and sexuality into age play, which is fascinating.
Both of the introduction videos hit upon a lot of the same kind of information and both defined age play in a really broad way. So often talk about age play that I’ve witnessed focuses on elementary and middle-school aged Littles with little focus on the Bigs except as accessories. Age play actually encompasses far more than that including an age range from infant to elder and the focus can be on the Bigs, or the play scene can include two Littles or two Bigs or any combination thereof. This concept seems obvious now.
Two of the concepts brought up in Power and Sex in Age Play video also easily transfer to any sort of play, not just age play: nonviolent communication and the concept of land mines and easter eggs. Nonviolent communication is “I” language, essentially. Lee Harrington is specifically is bringing it up in the context of a post-play debriefing, expressing your own experience rather than what the other person did or didn’t do. This is extremely important in all communication and is not commonly practiced in our society so it is fabulous he slips it in.
The concept of easter eggs really translates to all sorts of sexuality and, well, life., which are the antithesis of land mines. If land mines are triggers for some sort of “drama, trauma, or baggage” (a phrase Lee uses in the video), easter eggs are triggers for a pleasure or fetish that hadn’t been previously discovered. I love this idea.
Now that I’ve talked about the concepts of the videos with little actually about me it’s time to change that. One thing I realized through watching these videos is just how much age play I’ve done in the past that I wouldn’t have labeled as age play at the time including teacher/student roleplay (though that doesn’t have to be age play, but it was in the instances I’m thinking of). The conscious age play I engaged in was Daddy/boi roleplay with a previous partner but it was also extremely casual. We used some age play language but we never made the time for a drawn-out scene and our communication wasn’t the greatest either.
Since I prefer exploring a topic as fully as possible alone before bringing it to a partner I was inspired to Lee’s mention of doing some solo age play and so I tried a little of that, masturbating while wearing a different persona, and I discovered a lot about my own age play desires. I’m drawn to the Little side of things as both a little boy and a bratty and spoiled little girl, which I kind of was when I was younger and sometimes still am with Onyx unintentionally. I am also drawn to being a Daddy and possibly cultivating other Big personae as well. It’s actually been a slow process to liking the term Daddy, which I didn’t used to like but now kind of love.
I think I’m getting to the point where I’ve untangled enough of my emotions around age play that I would feel comfortable sharing it more with others. As I’ve written about before I’m working on playing with more attention and intention and this is one item on a long list of interesting, fun, and potentially easter egg discovering play.
-Scarlet Lotus