While I have gained skills or many new activities through numerous Kink Academy videos, such as bootblacking, rope bondage, and fire play, I have found that watching videos on activities that I already engage in is also extremely valuable. Instead of exposing me to a new way of looking at the entirety of something, like other videos have, usually watching videos of an activity or skill I already participate in or possess exposes me to a different perspective or slightly different techniques than I have used before.

I can’t remember exactly when Onyx and I started playing with face slapping, but we’ve been engaging in it a lot more in the last year or so than in the previous five years of our relationship. I think part of that has to do with the higher level of trust and intimacy we’ve experienced in this last year compared to all the others. I know we’d played with it casually before that, but it has become a pretty significant part of our play. Face slapping is one of the few activities that both turns me on and gets me into a submissive frame of mind practically instantaneously. It is quite powerful.

There are currently four videos on Face Slapping, all by Princess Kali: Sensations & Motivations, Safety, Techniques & Positions, and With Gloves & Feet. While we’ve engaged in face slapping for a while we still learned a lot from each video. A lot of the information was things we knew already, basic safety information and some of the techniques were familiar to us, but it was also helpful to have it all in one place. We had pieced a lot of the information together on our own, rather than having gone to a class on it, and hadn’t connected all of the dots that are connected in the videos for us.

The biggest thing I think we got out of the videos was the idea of training me not to move when a slap is coming. I had the tendency to do that for a while, to try to squirm out of the way, which was extremely dangerous for both of us. While squirming and consensual resisting is extremely fun for both of us, I don’t want the slap to land somewhere neither of us wants it, which has happened before. Not only am I now more aware of not squirming, Onyx is also more aware of not letting me squirm.

Watching the videos has also simply made the frequency of face slapping go up, or at least it feels like it has, and perhaps part of that is due to my lack of squirming now, who knows. It feels like our enjoyment of the activity has gone up after watching them, and perhaps that also has to do with a greater confidence in the activity on both sides.

Onyx has yet to try using the slap-squish technique that Kali mentions, but other than that we have implemented most of the techniques and positions to play with face slapping in different ways. I don’t think there’s one I haven’t liked yet, although often it rides that line between enjoyment and dislike that I really crave as a masochist. Each time he strikes me, be it a soft tap or a good smack, it is different, fueled by the perceived realities of that moment, which is why I feel this is one activity that will never get old.

-Scarlet Lotus